So this Friday, every football fan with a decent and honest heart died a little bit on the inside when Sepp “bellend” Blatter was re-elected as the president of FIFA… Where’s Al Murray and his campaign when you really need him eh?!
There’s so many things wrong with his re-election it’s unreal…
Firstly, Sepp is nearly 80 years old… I didn’t realise he was so old! In fact, Sepp Blatter is so old even Bruce Forsyth would look and go “Let it go mate, just let it go!” No wonder Sepp doesn’t listen to people when they tell him to step down. He’s so old he probably can’t hear what they’re saying!
Secondly, how did Sepp possibly win the election given the recent arrests of FIFA representatives, where the whole world discovered what most football fans already knew; that FIFA are so dodgy that they make the West Indian cricket board look organised! That FIFA are more full of crap than a teenage boy’s Internet search history!
So, what now? What can be done to get rid of Blatter? Some people have said that England should boycott the World Cup (How arrogant and typically English of us to assume that we’ll even qualify after our last major tournament in Brazil!)… If enough major countries were to boycott together then maybe it could work, but I don’t see enough big nations doing that. So the question remains, what now? I don’t know but I did enjoy Greg Dyke’s answer on a TV interview when he simply looked down the camera and said “Sepp Blatter won’t last four years”… He said it in a way like he knew something we didn’t… Like he had some sort of plan up his sleeve, or weapon in his inside pocket rather! It was the most middle-class version of The Godfather I’ve ever seen!
We don’t know what’s going to happen, but it’s going to be interesting.